January 6, 2013
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Sparkle and Glam
It’s just hard, you know? I look at you, and it hurts so much to know that we can’t be together.
You may hold my hand for awhile, but you hold my heart forever.
Even more, I had never meant to love him. One thing I truly knew- knew it in the pit of my stomach, in the center of my bones, knew it from the crown of my head to the soles of my feet, knew it deep in my empty chest- was how love gave someone the power to break you. I’d been broken beyond repair.
Sometimes, you just can’t have what you want when you want it. But that doesn’t mean you can never have it. Everything takes place at the right time. It’s not No, it’s just not now.
I know that there are some things about yourself that you think you would like to change. But you should know that there’s someone out there who’s gonna like you for everything you are, including those parts of you that you don’t even like. Those are gonna be the things that person likes most.
I don’t want to be alone, I want to be left alone.
Have you ever felt so alone that nothing makes sense? Well that’s how I feel right now. I feel like I’m facing everything myself, with nothing but tears and a fake smile.
Who you are is who you are. We’re liars. We’re thieves. We’re addicts. We take our happiness for granted until we hurt ourselves or someone else. We hold grudges. And when faced with our mistakes, we reinvent the past. We reinvent ourselves. At least we try. We’re prideful, and we’re lustful, and we’re incredibly flawed. And eventually, our flaws catch up to us.
The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight. Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time.
If you could read my mind, I wonder what you’d think of yourself.
