December 10, 2012

• I don’t want to miss this kiss

  

  I’ve lived my life inside daydreams, lies, imaginary friends that always knew one day I’d leave for good.

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  You know what the best feeling in the world is? Having a best friend, that one person who loves you & never judges you no matter what you matter how badly you fuck up. Someone who you have endless conversations with and can communicate by just using your eyes. That one person who just walks in your house, opens the fridge and grabs whatever they want out. Lastly it’s that person who knows so much about you that they could ruin your life in a second.  But you trust them with your life and you know that they will never ever do that no matter what.

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  They say there’s no one older than a high school senior, but no one younger than a college freshman. Well, I guess now we’ll find out, as we begin our journey. But as Cicero said, Amicitiae nostrae memoriam spero sempiternam fore, I hope the memory of our friendship will be everlasting. And just because we’re leaving Harbor does not mean that our learning is done. Tamdiu discendum est, quamdiu vivas, we must learn as long as we may live. But If I could leave you all with one final word of advice, Illegitimi non carborundum, don’t let the bastards get you down.

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  Do you know what scares me? When a person can say “Fuck it! I don’t care.” and really, truly mean it. When they can feel that anger surging through them, from their feet to the ends of their hair. It shouldn’t be like that. It should never come to that. There should be…safety nets. Friends, family, something…anything to catch them so they don’t reach that nasty, unforgiving bottom. Once they’re down there, there is almost no returning. Not completely anyways. That past will always follow them. It will forever be a shadow no matter if they have moved on from it or not. No matter if they pick up all the pieces, throw them out and start over. It is always there. This scares me.

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  Let’s complain about how much life sucks. But how much of it is actually bad? Sure, the guy of our dreams may have broken our hearts, but what about the millions of other people who have a broken life. They didn’t ask for any of this. We did. We allowed ourselves to trust the guy that everyone else was warning us about. We let him control our emotions. The other people didn’t ask for their lives to be ruined. But look at us anyways. We’re complaining and whining about a life that’s pretty damn great. We can get up on our feet and move forward. Where are the others going?

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  Everyone in the world could be screaming at me, telling me that I could do better and I wouldn’t care. I would stick my middle finger high in the air while my other hand was holding yours.

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  I wish that we could be friends again. I miss your presence and our countless-hour talks that have been replaced with countless hours of awkward silence.

  

  

  

  

  

  

   

  Sometimes all I really want to do is sit beside you. I want to watch cheesy and crappy movies with you, and we will laugh at them together. I want to plan things with you, things we’ll never do, but for some reason just planning them with you is fine with me. I want to talk to you about everything and anything. I want to goof around with you and make jokes that aren’t funny, but we’ll laugh at them nonetheless. I want to fall in love with you over and over and maybe at one point we’ll get tired of each other, but until then, I want you, and just you.

  

  

  

  

  

  

  You will be the only you to ever live on this planet. How fucking rad is that?

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  • 6:52 pm
  • 6 Comments